The last couple of months have been a whirlwind with ups and downs. It's been a learning process and when I thought I was getting through my shyness of meeting new people I thought I met some new friends I could get to know from meeting at church but now I feel like I'm the new kid in school not knowing my place on the Totem pole.
It just turns out I'm just a good babysitter and a person that can help take care of the church kids. Nothing more, nothing less. It sucks especially when I over hear conversations of girls night out and I'm not invited. I guess I'm not the cool person who could also use a break from motherhood and could use some girl time too. It just sucks!!
That's life and I should just remember who my real friends are not a group of women from church who only see me as one head who can help in the Nursery taking care of their children. So I'll be the quiet shy person at church with a smile on my face pretending to care. I know that's not nice to say but being me sucks at times when I feel used for just being a nice person who agreed to take care of there children so I could get to know them better. I was wrong. Who needs new friends?
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